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Friday, June 22, 2007

Pay not attention to the man behind the Curtain

Sometimes I worry a lot that I'll always be stuck in between the realms of the uninitiated and the expert. This seems to be a theme with me. Everything I get praise for, it's usually things that I know I don't do well enough to be seriously good at, just good enough to draw praise from the rubes like, say, a bright shiny object. Guitar, photography, public speaking, pretty much everything...I can pull a couple old tricks that make people with no experience think I'm good...like I'll strum some song in open chords on the guitar, and to someone who can't play the guitar that's pretty cool. But someone who can actually play knows its crap. Or photography...I might take a picture that's flawed in terms of GOOD photography, but it is enough to impress people who aren't really into photography. Or I know enough about computers to fix your mouse driver, but a real IT person knows Jack of all trades syndrome I suppose, but I just feel like a charlatan a lot. It would be nice to really excel at something. Something where I'm really a pro, not just a little better than average. I haven't found that yet. I guess it's good that I realize just because someone who knows nothing about subject X is impressed by my meager effort, it doesn't make the efforts good in an absolute sense.

meh.

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